12 things NOT to say to someone in a long distance relationship

I'm going to take a brief moment from the craft and redecorating ideas and share something that has been on my heart for a while. 

Long distance problems. 

Right now, my boyfriend and I have been together for 2.5 years!  
                                                      Yay!

Love him... SO much!! In those 2.5 years, we spent nearly everyday together and now have gone into long distance for a year... and counting.

 (Yeah, actually, June did mark 1 year of long distance in the books.) 

We met in College, and I went home after graduating, and he also went home alllllll the way in Nevada. 

Going to an LDR (Long Distance Relationship) was not an easy thing and is still hard to get through sometimes. Long work days and then spending the evening alone, no more dates or new memories... you get the sad picture.

I wanted to write this post because LD couples are far and few between-- so go easy on them! Separation for any period of time is hard to get through when your heart wants to be with your best friend!

Sometimes, people want to say something comforting and it just doesn't come out right. Just like a tragedy or loss, people feel the need to comment to keep the conversation light, but it ends up hurting the person. (Like the good ol' Romans 8:28 response in the middle of a crises).

(Note: Even though I'm making light of my responses, I have had this all said to me at some point this year while being away from Dan).

 

12 things NOT to say to someone in a long distance relationship

Because really? This is how we all want to respond:

1. "Wow. Long distance is rough. You must miss him."

Probably the most obvious statement for the next 10 years to come. Every day I'm away from him, a piece of my heart dies. I'm basically a zombie now.

2. "You know what they say, long distance never works out!"

Well good thing true love knows no distance! And thanks for the confidence boost!

3. "I could never do that- I don't know how you can."

This, I know is meant well, but it just gives us the sad realization of how hard it is to be away from each other. But not much else.

4. Flirting or cheating jokes.

Seriously the worst, and so rude! Our relationship is not so unstable for me to question every unanswered text, but saying this to someone is so disrespectful. Every relationship is built on trust- why would being apart be any different? Joking that he is getting his last rounds with other girls before he settles down is going too far, and I would never risk our relationship by doing the same behind his back.

5. "Why don't you both just move in together?"

We have both decided to stay pure until marriage, and... don't you think I would have already thought of that by now?

6. "He must not care that much to put you both in long distance."

And you don't realize how hard we are both trying to get through this together. This relationship is worth it. We need each other.

 

7. "You can't relate to this because your boyfriend isn't here."

 Probably one of the most hurtful things said to me. I just ended up walking away *internally sobbing*

8. "Why doesn't he just marry you already?"

Since I've never had the goal to propose to my boyfriend, I guess that's up to him to decide when that time is best. 

9. "What do you do instead?"

Well I cry a lot- does that count as face cardio? Seriously, I go to work, think about Daniel, come home, think about Daniel, and go to bed thinking about Daniel! 

Oh, the occasional action movie... that pretty much sums up my life without him!

 

 

10. "If it were me, it wouldn't be worth it. Date someone in your town."

If anyone has ever been in my town, you would understand the impossibility of this one. #RednecksForDaysss

#ShallowStatement. 

11. "Long distance is good because you can use that time to be free. It's like being single again! *inserts laughter*"

*Internally crying some more* Can I just have my man? I've done all I want to when I was 'wild and single.'

 

12. "I can sooo relate! I spent a summer in long distance. Never doing that again!"   

Honey, you can't relate to the feeling of celebrating Christmas, your birthday and Valentine's Day without him. I would be glad to trade a few weeks of fishing and swimming for holidays and season changes with him any day!

I know this is one of the most open and blunt posts I've ever put on here.

Maybe now you know someone going through this. But what is the best way to make them feel better?

 Here are some great ways to improve their mood:

- Buy them coffee

- Give them a hug

- Just listen to them

- Tell them their doing a great job/they can make it!

- Pay for their boyfriend or girlfriend to be shipped to their house!